The first time I led a large-scale project, I distinctly remember the feeling of dread when team members’ well-meaning, creative contributions bubbled over my threshold to make them happen. That dread turned to stone-cold panic. The anxiety that rose up from my gut, trying to eek out through a polite smile and pained reply of, “sure we can do that!”--whoo boy. I can laugh about it now, but back then it felt like my baked-on outer layer of perfectionism lost a chunk right in front of a co-worker.
That was approximately two pregnancies, two cities, and three jobs ago. I’ve learned a lot since then, and the biggest lesson is that, in almost every way, I have to stop being so damn careful all the time. Stop being careful not to offend those still clinging to white supremacy, and stop being afraid to fail.
This year, I am beyond grateful to have made it this far considering just how deprived, hungry, and broken our nation. It’s a privilege to share this year’s top growth moments with you:
I overhauled an org’s creative workflows to create more bandwidth for storytelling and advocacy.
I joined a small cohort of experienced, committed professionals in fostering a diverse, equitable, and inclusive workplace for employees.
I released my vision of People + Planet / Profit into the world through Bound for Good, and I started actually. doing. the thing.
I got my sh*t rocked by the Groundwater, Phase I and Phase II trainings I took with the Racial Equity Institute.
I repented of carrying a yoke that was too heavy for me after being tenderly convicted by Dr. Chanequa Barnes’ book, Too Heavy a Yoke. Now I rest more and with less guilt.
This year has shocked me in terms of realized potential amidst heartbreak. I don’t think I would have allowed so much to happen had I not first learned how to begin letting go of perfectionism.
Have you had any breakthrough moments this year? What realized potential have you seen?